From the Middle East to Brussels: A Journey Through Diplomacy and Lessons for Aspiring Diplomats

By Reka Felber and Nefeli Gkaroutsou

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Could you share with us your journey to becoming the Director General of External Relations for the EU? Were there any pivotal moments that shaped your career path?

What I have done is that, after my university studies, I started working in the private sector. I worked for an American company in the Middle East, which was a great and very interesting experience. I thoroughly enjoyed working in the private sector. However, someone suggested that I apply for the Dutch diplomatic service since I am Dutch myself.

So, I applied for the diplomatic service, which involved a very long selection process lasting about eight months. Fortunately, I received the good news that I had been accepted. The competition was quite tough; at that time, there were around 1,200 applicants, and only 10 were selected.

Once you join the diplomatic service, you undergo diplomatic training. At that time, the training lasted a year and covered all aspects of diplomatic work, including political, economic, cultural development cooperation, European affairs, and more—essentially the entire spectrum of diplomacy. My first posting was in Paris, where I worked at the embassy, focusing on media, communication, and cultural affairs.

Afterward, I returned to The Hague and worked in the Middle East Department. Just two weeks into the job, the Declaration of Principles on the Middle East was signed in Oslo, opening new prospects for a peaceful resolution to the Middle East conflict. This was a very intense period. During the Dutch presidency of the EU, I worked closely with the European Commission, which later asked me to join their Middle East Directorate.

From the Commission, I moved to the Council Secretariat, shifting my focus from Middle Eastern affairs to multilateral matters, such as the UN, Transatlantic relations, Organization for Security and Co-operation in Europe (OSCE), and the Council of Europe. In 2010, I had the privilege of joining the team of the convention on the future of Europe, led by Giscard d’Estaing. This was an exciting time as the EU was preparing to expand with 10 new Member States, requiring significant institutional and political work to make the EU ready for the future.

Later, I served at the Dutch permanent representation to the EU in Brussels, managing external relations during the Dutch presidency. Upon returning to The Hague, I became Deputy Director for the Human Rights Directorate, overseeing human rights, good governance, and humanitarian assistance, and we developed a human rights strategy for Dutch foreign policy that remains publicly available today. 

Subsequently, I was appointed Managing Director for the Western Hemisphere, covering the Americas and the Caribbean. This role combined internal and external responsibilities for the Netherlands, including managing relations with the U.S., as well as the Caribbean Islands of the Dutch Kingdom and their ties with Venezuela.

Later, I served as the Dutch Ambassador to Belgium, a role requiring close attention to the intense trade and neighborly relations between the two countries. Following this, I joined the cabinet of Charles Michel as Chief Foreign Policy Advisor and Deputy Head of Cabinet.

Finally, an opportunity arose within the Council Secretariat, where I now serve as Director General of External Relations. My portfolio includes external relations, crisis management, and the enlargement of the EU.

What I appreciate most about diplomacy is the ability to engage in varied work, changing focus every three to five years, while staying within the same organization. This diversity suits my broad interests in economic, political, and public diplomacy issues, allowing me to explore many perspectives without changing employers.

Given your diverse career, from the Middle East peace process to leading diplomatic missions, what key lessons would you impart to students aspiring to enter the field of diplomacy today?

It all begins with interest—and ambition. Diplomacy requires you to step out of your comfort zone and embrace new challenges. Every three to five years, you’ll need to adapt to a new country, a new culture, and a new way of working. This constant change demands a genuine passion for learning and a willingness to adjust, not only professionally but also personally.

Flexibility is crucial. In the past, the typical diplomat might have been a man with a spouse who did not work, moving their family from post to post. Today, life is much more complex, with dual-career households and diverse family situations. You must be prepared to embrace the logistical and emotional challenges of relocating across countries while managing both personal and professional commitments.

As for academic preparation, diplomacy is surprisingly flexible in terms of what you study. I pursued Middle Eastern Studies and Philosophy, but my colleagues came from a variety of backgrounds—Economics, History, even Medical Studies. What is essential is not the specific subject but the skills you develop: strong analytical thinking, an understanding of global interconnectedness, and the ability to present yourself well.

Effective communication is another cornerstone of diplomacy. You must be comfortable speaking and interacting with others, often in high-stakes situations. Shyness can make the role challenging, but confidence and clear communication are skills you can build over time. Writing is equally important—you need to write quickly, concisely, and with precision, often under considerable pressure.

Diplomacy also demands resilience. You will face stressful situations, as I did when I was the Dutch Ambassador to Belgium during the 2016 terrorist attacks. These moments test your ability to remain calm, make decisions under pressure, and lead effectively.

Finally, diplomacy is about curiosity and awareness. You need to be genuinely interested in people, cultures, and global affairs. This interest, combined with the readiness to adapt and grow, forms the foundation of a successful diplomatic career. If you are willing to embrace the challenges and opportunities that come with this field, it can be an incredibly rewarding path.

With over 30 years of experience in European and foreign affairs, how do you see the role of diplomacy evolving in response to today’s complex global challenges, particularly in relation to scepticism about its effectiveness?

I think diplomacy is essential for promoting not only a country’s interests but also its values on the international stage. Even in times when the world was less interconnected—when an ambassador might travel for months to take up a post in another country—diplomacy existed and was vital.

Today, the world is far more interconnected. We have digital tools that enable instant communication, and news flashes across our screens every second. Despite this technological advancement, the need for diplomacy remains unchanged.

Diplomacy is fundamentally about building networks—both nationally and at the EU level. These networks act as channels for promoting our interests and values, investing in crisis prevention, engaging in dialogue with other countries, and fostering predictability in international relations.

The world abhors a void. If we fail to engage in diplomacy, others will fill that space, often to our detriment. Active diplomacy means maintaining dialogue with other countries, forming alliances, and fostering cooperation. It strengthens a country’s position by creating economic opportunities, advancing political goals, and promoting stability.

Without diplomacy, we risk being uninformed about developments in the world, which can lead to unintended consequences. Escalations that might have been mitigated through dialogue, can turn into crises or wars, with far-reaching and devastating impacts. Every government has a responsibility to ensure the security, stability, and prosperity of its people. While this starts domestically, it cannot be achieved without active international engagement.

To be active on the global stage, a country needs a robust diplomatic service and a proactive approach. Some may question the value of investing in diplomacy, arguing for a focus solely on domestic issues. However, a country like the Netherlands, for instance, derives 80% of its prosperity from trade and international exchange. Its economy is not self-sufficient.

Economic, political, and security objectives are deeply interconnected, and most cannot be achieved without effective diplomacy. This makes the role of diplomacy indispensable in today’s complex global landscape.

What advice would you offer to young individuals who are passionate about diplomacy but feel disheartened by critiques that it is inefficient or ineffective?

First of all, it is wonderful to hear that young people are interested in diplomacy. I genuinely believe it is the right choice, and I hope many of you will consider it as a career path. Diplomacy thrives on diversity—in background, gender, and perspective—which ensures the best representation of a country or organization on the international stage.

As for those who claim diplomacy is ineffective, I have to question their basis for such critiques. Diplomacy has often prevented terrible events, de-escalated tensions, and maintained essential ties between countries, even in times of conflict. Resolving disputes through dialogue is always preferable to resolving them through violence. A country without diplomacy loses its ability to promote its interests, understand global developments, and influence the international stage. 

I strongly encourage you and your peers to consider diplomacy as a career. It is incredibly fulfilling. Every day, whether in meetings, the office, or on a mission, your work is directly linked to current global events—you often see the results of your efforts on the front pages of newspapers. Diplomacy is also tied to a country’s economic strength, so it is vital that we build both aspects for the future.

Of course, diplomacy requires specific skills and preparation. Strong communication abilities, active listening, and a solid understanding of global interconnectedness are key. You also need to stay informed by reading newspapers and being able to zoom out and see the broader picture. There are many ways to prepare yourself, both academically and through extracurricular activities. These experiences will help you develop the necessary competences and broaden your perspective.

For example, internships are incredibly valuable. While EU internships are competitive and limited, an internship with an embassy or an international organisation can be equally relevant. These experiences offer insights into diplomatic work and help you build connections and skills.

Another path is through the national diplomatic service, which can lead to roles in the European External Action Service (EEAS) or other EU institutions. This is the route I took. Alternatively, you can apply directly to EU bodies like the European Commission or the Council Secretariat. Both paths offer opportunities to contribute to international diplomacy.

One of the most important qualities for a diplomat is openness to new experiences. For example, being seconded to work in different settings can provide crucial insights into how other organizations operate.  

The Director General asked us where we are originally from and we each replied; I, Reka Felber, am originally from Hungary but grew up in Belgium and I, Nefeli Gkaroutsou, was born and raised in Greece. We also mentioned that we both moved to the Netherlands for our bachelor’s degree.

Living and studying abroad, as you have, is already a great start—it exposes you to challenges and opportunities that broaden your worldview. If these experiences excite and motivate you, diplomacy might be the perfect career choice for you.

Ultimately, a career in diplomacy begins with curiosity—an interest in people, cultures, and global affairs. If you find joy in learning about and engaging with the world, that’s the best foundation for becoming a diploma